What Advice Would You Give Your Younger Self?

Everyone comes to a point in their life when they wonder, “Have I made the right choices?” Maybe it’s all gone right: life is a breeze and you regret nothing? All of us will be able to look back on certain turning points, when we might have made a different choice or adopted different habits or behavior. So what advice would you give your younger self?

Practical Advice for My Younger Self

• Smile more. 
• Spend less money on things you don’t need.
• Spend less money than you earn.
• Don’t acquire stuff that needs looking after. 
• Embrace a capsule wardrobe.
• Put aside ten percent of your income. Always.
• Slow down.
• Continue your education. Invest in yourself; skills, courses, qualifications, etc.
• Remember in school when you told your careers teacher you wanted to be a writer (or artist, singer, journalist, deep sea diver)? You should do that thing now instead of waiting until decades have passed. Do it in your spare time, if you have to, but do it.
• Don’t give up too soon. The breakthrough could be round the next corner.
• Take every opportunity to increase your skills.
• Try new things all the time. Don’t worry about not sticking with one activity or path.
• Take more risks but don’t do stupid.
• Learn to say no.
• Don’t risk your health for anything.
• Be completely financially independent as soon as possible. You should never have to rely on someone else for financial support.
• Ask yourself if, on your deathbed, you will wish you’d spent more time on your phone/looking at a screen/watching TV. You have the gift of time; don’t fritter it away.
• Don’t waste time waiting for people. Decide on your limit then walk away; you have better things to do. Your time is just as precious as theirs.
• Take a year to travel; do more things. You’ll never regret it.
• Don’t stay at parties/events if you are bored. Just leave.
• Teach your children practical skills.
• Enter competitions: writing, art, skill, luck. Just do it. You’ve nothing to lose.
• Piercings generally heal over; tattoo removal leaves ugly scars.

Relationship Advice 

• Smile more.
• Love yourself. You are your own best friend.
• Only sleep with people you like. And you don’t have to do it on the first, second, or even third date if you don’t want to.
• If they pressure you, dump them.
• Don’t date anyone who talks about their ex in a derogatory way. It’s a red flag.
• Don’t change yourself to fit someone else’s ideal.
• You can’t control another’s thoughts, feelings, reactions, actions, so don’t try.
• Avoid over-analyzing. It is what it is.
• Walk away from people who are not good for you. It’s not going to get any better.
• If someone tells you they are broken, bad, or unhappy, walk away. They’re telling the truth.
• Never stay around negative people.
• Don’t bother looking to others for approval. Give it to yourself.
• Be kind but don’t be a doormat.
• Give praise where it is due.
• Avoid criticizing them. Bite your tongue.
• You don’t have to accept every offer of a date.
• Don’t be afraid to leave politely.
• If they talk garbage, leave.
• If they display an ideological viewpoint that you can’t live with, walk away.
• Don’t date marrieds.
• Keep the channels of communication open.
• Don’t give the silent treatment.
• If you can’t trust your partner, consider if you should be in this relationship.
• Don’t expect your partner to read your mind.
• Words spoken in anger cannot be unsaid.
• Arguments and fights happen; apologize for your contribution.
• Don’t compare your relationship with someone else’s.
• Learn to love solitude. It can be an acquired skill.
• You can’t fix another person. Neither can they fix you.
• If you have to make excuses for them, it might be another red flag.
• Learn from your relationship mistakes.
• Don’t date your ex’s best friend. 
• Don’t let anyone force you to do anything you don’t want to.
• Don’t take photos of your naked body or let anyone record you having sex. You might be proud of your body, but would you want your parents seeing these photos/videos?

Spiritual and Personal Advice for My Younger Self

• Smile more.
• Tend to your own well-being.
• Don’t gossip.
• Be grateful and appreciative – for everything.
• You don’t need to impress anyone.
• Worrying is a waste of energy.
• Don’t try to be something you are not.
• What you think is important probably isn’t.
• Right now, in this moment, everything is just fine.
• Know that you are in control. You make the decisions. Life is something you do, not something that happens to you.
• All problems are temporary. Every obstacle you face will one day be in the past. 
• Don’t give your power to others.
• Do not judge others if you don’t want to be judged.
• What do you want the world to remember you for?
• Avoid comparing your life to others’.
• Learn to trust your intuition.
• Forgiveness is for your benefit, not theirs.
• Think about your existence and why you are here.
• When you can’t change things, go with the flow.
• Take time to relax.
• Talk less, listen more.
• Cultivate curiosity.
• Experience nature, walk to recharge your batteries.
• Know that you have the power to change things.
• Listen to older people. They have lived what you are living.
• Buy yourself a tarot deck and learn it.
• Reach for joy.

And so we come back to the present. It’s a good moment to evaluate all the positives you have in your life, and to think… if you hadn’t gone through all that you did and made all those mistakes, you wouldn’t be the person you are now. Put past regrets and self-doubt away; they do not serve you well. What’s important is from here onwards. Look for the joy in everything.

Photos courtesy of Unsplash