We are asked so many questions here at Psychic Elements, and relationships are top of the list. Love is a beautiful thing, for sure, but it is also one of the most difficult aspects of life to navigate. Today, we’re attempting to shine a light on one of the most common relationship quandaries: taking a break.
Taking a break can often breathe new life into a stale or floundering relationship. For some it is an important component in their relationship. Many established couples take separate vacations and come back to their marriage refreshed and rejuvenated. But what if your relationship isn’t that steady? How do you manage relationship breaks?
Factors to Consider
- Ask yourselves why you think you need a break. What do you hope it will achieve?
- Is this break the result of a fight? In which case it would be better for you to communicate and resolve the reason for the argument rather than not speak.
- Is this something you both want? Is your partner agreeing to it reluctantly?
- Are you attempting to resolve non-negotiable differences? For example, one partner insists on marriage, or maybe they adamantly assert they never want children. These differences in the fundamental aspects of permanent relationships can never be resolved without one partner acceding to the other. That is disastrous in the longer term. A temporary relationship break might help you revise your priorities, but talking to each other will do more to find a resolution.
My Heart was Broken, How Can I Trust My Lover Again?
It’s hard to build trust after you’ve been let down or cheated on. If you are trying to decide whether to give your lover a second chance, you have to know that it’s what you really want. In order to do this, you need some space to think and examine your feelings about them. Explain you are willing to give them another chance but you have to build up trust slowly and that entails some time on your own. Take a break for a couple of weeks and then see how you feel. The time away from them will help your heart to heal and also clarify your thoughts.
I Love Him More Than He Loves Me—What Can I Do?
When a relationship is unbalanced it is unlikely to work. If one partner is more devoted than the other, it can result in feelings of overwhelm and pressure. Try to step back a little and give them some space. A few days break will help you both. Your lover may realize that your relationship is more important to them than they thought. You will learn that you could be pushing the relationship too fast. Slow it down and take it easy.
Are Relationship Breaks Good?
Sometimes it is good to have a temporary break in order to make decisions and to clarify your feelings. However, before making a mutual decision about taking a break, you have to agree on the terms. Is it a complete break where the partners become single again and therefore do what they please? Or is it just a relationship vacation where you keep in touch but reduce the amount you see each other? It’s important for you both to know where you stand. To know that at the end of a certain length of time, you’ll get back together and/or be making a decision about the future.
She Suggested Taking a Break But I’m Not Sure Why?
She owes you an explanation why she feels a relationship break would be a good idea. Otherwise you will be just left hanging, not knowing if the relationship is on or off. Just ask her straight out why she wants a timeout. Also ask yourself if things have been running smoothly lately or has your partner seemed uncomfortable or distant? There may be clues there that all is not well. Open up the lines of communication and talk to each other honestly.
How Long Should a Relationship Break Last?
That’s up to you. It might just take a few days for you to reinvigorate the relationship. If it goes longer than a month, there may be serious doubts whether it is viable. Then again, a longer time apart might be just what you need to get back on track. Discuss it with your partner and come to a mutually agreeable decision.
Should We Stay in Touch?
It’s good to stay in touch during a relationship break, but it shouldn’t be constant. The idea is to give yourselves time to work things out in your head, to determine how you feel about each other and the relationship. So agree to make contact once a day or every other day. If you are texting and phoning each other all the time that isn’t a break.
Can I See Other People While on a Break?
In most cases, no, that’s not a good idea. However, it depends on what basis you have agreed to take a break. Perhaps you have never dated anyone else other than your current partner? However you agree the break, it’s important to lay out your ground rules. Your partner may be happy to date other people while you are not. In which case, you have to seriously consider if the relationship is working.
You both should be aware that dating other people poses a risk that you will fall in love with someone else. If that’s the deal, and it’s acceptable, then go ahead. What you should not do, is to date other people without your current partner knowing. Being on a break does not give you free rein to cheat.
I Want My Partner to Make Changes in Their Behavior
Taking a relationship break can enable a badly behaving partner to realize that they might be about to lose your love and support unless they make a radical change. It doesn’t always work, but if you are trying to save a relationship, then anything is worth a go. For example, if they have an addiction, the shock of a temporary break up might galvanize them into making a positive decision. The operative word, of course, is ‘might’.
Talk it Over
There are no hard and fast rules for taking relationship breaks, apart from one: talk it over thoroughly. You have to both agree that it’s a good idea, and to lay out the basic ground rules for the break. You also need to determine what you want the break to achieve. Be open and honest with each other, after all no-one said love would be easy.
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