When Soulmates Break Up

soulmate relationship

It’s the most glorious human condition. To be so in love with someone that when you look at them, you can’t work out why you are two separate beings. Yet even when you are apart, you are never really apart. It’s as if you live your life looking through their eyes. Every thought you have is an internal conversation with your soulmate.  So what happens when soulmates break up… how can it happen? What if they were never your soulmate in the first place?

soulmate relationship wrapped in a blanket
Photo by Joanna Nix on Unsplash

How To Identify Your Soulmate Relationship

When you meet them, you know it’s fate. A flash of recognition. A glance that shows you he or she feels the same. It’s a certain knowing and when you feel it, it’s unmistakable.

They become your best friend, your rock, your anchor. Your soulmate soothes away your anxieties. They are a harbor in the tempest.

You are free to be yourself with them. There’s no need to act or pretend or be on your best behavior. They love you whatever.

“I feel like a part of my soul has loved you since the beginning of everything. Maybe we’re from the same star.” –

Emery Allen

Soulmate or Twin Flame?

It’s common to mix up a soulmate with a twin flame. The difference is that your soulmate is by your side no matter what. Your twin flame is there to teach you. They hold up a mirror — if you think this person is wrong or behaving badly, take a look at yourself.  Twin flame relationships rarely last a lifetime. Sometimes they are only around for a week. Sometimes they keep coming back over the years. Twin flame relationships are hard work. They’re supposed to be. Life lessons are tough.

Your soulmate relationship isn’t like that at all. Sure you might fight but it is painful for both of you. It feels awful, exactly like you tore your own heart out. You don’t feel right until you are back in each other’s arms.

“A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we’re pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person, we’re safe in our own paradise.” –

Richard Bach

When Your Soulmate is with Someone Else

It’s not an unusual situation. You meet someone. Eyes lock. He’s The One. But he’s married. Or she is living with someone and they have children. You feel like you have to shift heaven and earth to be with that one person. Yet, it’s impossible. Human history is littered with unfulfilled love, romantic tragedies, classical and modern. You won’t be the first or the last to find your soulmate and then have to see them live their life with another. It’s the most painful kind of love there is.

Your Soulmate Relationship is Out of Time

Another heartrending situation is when you meet your soulmate; you know them instantly, but you were born decades apart. Some couples ignore the taboos of older/younger partners, but for most, we cannot overcome the social barriers when it comes to inter-generational love. In these situations it is sometimes better for the soulmate to settle for a rewarding friendship, a mentor/student type of relationship.

When Soulmates Break Up

If your soulmate has left you, then he or she is probably not your soulmate. Only in the most extreme cases do people sacrifice their soulmate relationship for some higher purpose. If they are free to be with you, but they are not, then you have to let it go. They were never your soulmate in the first place.

soulmate relationship in check shirts
Photo by Jose Escobar on Unsplash

I Love My Husband but He’s Not My Soulmate

Occasionally, it requires many passing years before you understand that the person you think you settled for was actually your soulmate all along. Not all soulmate relationships are intense. If your love has lasted a long time, and it is still there. If you are each other’s best friends and confidantes. If you couldn’t imagine life without them, they are your soulmate. 

If, however, you are feeling deep dissatisfaction in your marriage and think that perhaps you missed your chance at finding your soulmate, it’s time for some honest evaluation. Do you want to remain in the marriage, or not? You will be taking a risk– after all, you might never meet your soulmate.

Can I Have More than One Soulmate?

Yes, it’s possible to meet several soulmates throughout your life. 

“Most people have more than one soulmate. A soulmate can come in the form of a life partner, friend, child, or lover. A soul mate can be someone with whom you share a spiritual path, a joint work in the world, or a commitment to be parents to certain souls. It can be one whose growth you are sponsoring, such as a child.” –

Sanaya Roman

Generally speaking, you only have one love relationship soulmate in your lifetime, although there are exceptions. It is also true that you can love deeply and reciprocally without ever finding your soulmate. Not very many people actually do have a soulmate for life.

How to Get Over a Soulmate Relationship

What if your soulmate relationship has failed? As with the ex question above, soulmate relationships don’t fail because one partner walks. If they do, it was probably never a soulmate relationship in the first place. 

With other kinds of soulmate relationships, such as teachers, friends, mentors, etc., they tend to have a natural and limited time span. They provide what you (both) need and often fade away. 

If you met your soulmate and can’t be with them, it’s very hard to deal with. Every fiber of your being wants to be with that person. You have to find some way to get past it. You cannot allow your life to be put on hold or ruined. Remember, soulmate relationships occur throughout time, and, if you believe in reincarnation, you will have many more chances to be together. So, meanwhile, in this life, you have to move on. There will be someone else for you.

Quotations courtesy of Quote Ambition

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3 Responses

  1. I feel like Im dying. My heart physically hurts. My boyfriend of 6 years is done.  We are both married with sick spouses.  He told me he needed space because his step daughter saw us chatting on messenger.  I let him have space for a week then went crazy! Calling him every word I could think of. I thought if he really loved me he would find a way to communicate.  We had such a connection. It waa crazy how we felt about each other but I think I pushed him over the edge. He told me to stop emailing him.  I sent one llas email begging for forgiveness and how sorry I was. I sent that a few hours ago. I won't send anymore. We have been through a lot together and I always thought we could work through anything. He's a pisces too so Im hoping after some time he will be back. This all started end of December and Im doing things to take care of myself but I want this feeling to go away. I want to rip my heart out.  My husband is a t1 diabetic who has had everything from a heart attack to now a double amputee.  He has never done anything to take care of himself.  He never went on walks, ate more salads. I should have left him a long time ago because he's not nice either. I feel like I will never get over him.

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